At ELP, we work with the Ten Commandments of Dialogue. The seventh is thinking win-win. A dialogue is different from a discussion or a debate. In many organizations colleagues are competing with each other. They try to out-argue their counterpart, score points, prove that they are right and the other is wrong, etc. They feel better by defeating the other. Too many people excel in talking at cross-purposes. They have conversations in which both sides completely miss each other, like ships passing in the night.
Therefore some participants need to change their mindset: they don’t have to win at the table, which is different from the competitive setting most of them work in every day. The intention of an ELP Leadership Dialogue is cooperation, not competition. All participants can learn a lot from their peers at the table. Being right is not important, and out-arguing others is even counter-productive. A dialogue is joint effort, not a sequence of monologues.
Source : European Leadership Platform